A NEW CREATION
by
Gayle E. Guthrie
Presented before the
Chicago Literary Club
November 6, 2000
Copyright Gayle E. Guthrie
You gotta understand, I been a good God-fearing woman all my life
and I
pray for my sins every night. And I pray for God to bless me and
my
children and my children's children and all my friends and
neighbors. I
even prays for them that's done me wrong. I been alivin' a long
time and
there's been lots a folks that have done harm or meanness to me,
but I pray
to God for their souls, just like I oughta. The Lord guides my
life and I
believe. I really do. I believes in God. But I gots a few
problems with
the good book.
Like I was taught when I was a girl, I read my Bible every day.
An' I find
comfort, real low down soul soothin' comfort from some parts.
'Specially
them beatitudes. It's nice to know that the meek like me will
inheirit the
earth. Course it'd be nice if I'd inheirit a bit right now, but
that ain't
neither here nor there. I even read it cover to cover twice
through now,
but it ain't no help. I still get hung up on the first part. I
gets the
second part, 'bout how the Lord was aborn in a stable and about
his sorrow
and how he died for our sins. And I believe that part with all my
heart.
But the first part, that really gives me trouble.
I ain't had much schoolin' and maybe that's the problem. I gets
the
begatin' stuff even if the ages seem awful old to me. Don't think
I's gonna
live as long as Mathusala and don't thinks I wants to. But that
ain't up to
me, it's God's decision-t'ain't mine. But as I was sayin' afore I
got off
track, I gets the stories like Daniel in the lion's den and the
wanderin'
boy who was lost for so long but finally came on home to his
daddy and ma.
They's been a comfort to me, too. But the beginning, that just
don't make
no sense to me a'tall. Maybe them perfessers can understand how
it all
began, but I can't. It just don't make no sense to me. Now the
preacher man
he tells me that every word is the exact word of God and I gotta
believe in
every exact word. But I's been thinkin' bout it for a while now,
and I
been areadin' an' areadin' Genesis over and over an' over agin
and I think
that they gots it wrong.
Now, I ain't sayin' that the good book ain't a good book. And I
ain't
sayin I don't believe, cause I do. I's just sayin' that they got
it wrong.
They gots it mostly down right, I guess, at least I thinks that
they got
most of the bare facts down best they could, but facts don't make
it truth
and the truth of it is that they gave poor ol' Eve a bum
rap.
The way I figure it is this; those poor suckers that was writin'
down God's
word just didn't have time to get it all down just as God was
atalkin'.
What with no tape recorders or nothin' not even good Pitman
shorthand likes
I was taught, they just was too slow to get down every single
word God was
dictatin'. I mean, God's talkin' at God speed and they's
awritin' at
people speed and there just ain't no way it all git down right.
Those guys
back then they got to deal with those big heavy stones to write
on with
tiny little chisels to dig it in with, and man there just ain't
no time to
get it all. Chip chip chip for each little letter takes a lot of
time. So
they put down what they could and go back later and fill in the
missin'
parts. In truth, there just ain't no other way to do it. Had to
be guys
chippin' away 'cause if it t'was gals they would of stopped God
from agoin'
so fast and asked some questions. Guys just always pretend that
they can
handle the job even if they cain't. Never been a guy yet who
thought to
ask. It jus' ain't in their genes to admit they's ain't got the
story
straight, or that they don't understand. They just let God keep
on a
dictatin' and they make up what they didn't get later. Like they
do when
they tell us about their fishin', you knows what I mean.
It all starts see, with how God decided to put together a world
because
like the good book says the earth was without form and void. That
means
that there was nothin, nothin there a'tall. So God decided to
create the
world, just for the fun of it. Ain't got nothin' better to do, I
guess.
God likes creatin' things. It takes a great mind indeed to think
of
somethin' that ain't ever been made before. And as I said God is
great and
good. So after lookin' around at all that nothin'ness he created
the
heaven and the earth. Now this part makes sense to me. I mean
the very
first thing that anybody would do is create their own livin'
place. I
thinks its true what they say about cleanliness, you know, being
part of
God. And makin' order out of chaos, that was God's first
accomplishment.
And a right big accomplishment it was, too. So, on the first day
he took a
look around at all this nothin' but dirt and stuff just afloatin'
all over
and decided to make somethin' out of it.
The Book don't say much about how he did it, nor nothin' about
what heaven
looks like, which is another reason why I thinks that those
little
chiselers must be guys. Men don't never notice the color of the
curtains,
or if the walls are pink or blue, nor any of the little stuff
that makes a
place special. So they probably just stopped a chippin' away and
let God
talk on a bit whilst they caught up on their notes. But heaven
must be a
mighty great place if it's where God lives. You puts all the
best stuff in
your own place, so I figure heaven must be filled with music and
rainbows
and fluffy clouds and wonderful stuff I don't know nothin' about
but would
enjoy if I did. That's why I hopes to go to heaven when I
die.
It don't say nothin' about creatin' earth either, but I just
figure that
all the stuff down here is the stuff that ain't quite good enough
to be in
heaven. Earth is sorta the storage closet for heaven. You know,
filled
with stuff too bad to keep in the house, but too good to go into
the trash.
Then the Lord turns on the lights. I mean he just says, "Let
there be
light," and there it was. Light. Light everywhere, just like when
ol' FDR
flipped the switch on the TVA and the 'lectric came on. No fuss,
no
trouble. He said the word and there it was. He called the light
"day" and
he called the darkness "night". Before he called it a day and
took his
rest, as we used to say, he pronounced his own work good, just
like any ol'
artist does. That was the end of the first day.
Once God had built his own place and turned on the lights, he
started in on
all the stuff surrounding it. So he collects this dirt and dust
and a big
ol' wad of clay that he kinda gathered up out of the nothing and
rolled it
'round and 'round in his hands like he was makin' a dumpling. He
rolled it
so fast that it got hotter and hotter 'til it just burst into
flames. Them
flames got so hot God just a flung it outta his hand and sent it
awhirlin'
into space. He flung it so hard and so fast that sparks flew
every which
way as it was asailin' through space. And that's how God made
the sun and
the stars that's still aburnin' up thar in the sky.
There was a lot of water all around in that nothin'ness I figure.
Seems to
me there was no way to tell the fog from the rain, nor the rain
from the
river, nor the river from the ocean, like it was when I visited
my sister
in Seattle; too wet to tell which way is up. Because the waters
had to be
separated from the waters, God made the rivers and oceans the
good book
says. Best I can tell he gave direction to the rain and kept the
rainbow
betwixt heaven and earth.
Next he gathered up another little hunka clay from the
nothin'ness and the
clouds and started arollin' it again. He didn't roll this so
fast this
time. He just kinda played with it, squeezing it hard here and
pushing it
out a little there. It musta been really sticky stuff, kinda like
egg drop
dumplin' batter. Ofcourse it was still real humid while he was
working so
it wasn't all that easy to make the land smooth. We're talkin'
about God
here, of course, so it could have been done, but maybe he finds
it fun to
work with sticky stuff, likes I do. It pulled up from his hands
to make the
mountains all craggy with peaks and valleys and all them other
hills. When
it was adone it looked kinda like one of those kreplock dumplin'
ol' Mrs.
Goldberg usta make. Whilst he was workin' the sweat from his
brown fell
and collected in the big dents, depressions and dips in the
dumplin'. I
think that's why the seas are salty, because God worked so hard.
My great-gramm-mammy, she was a native woman, you know, well her
people
said that the people that live in the middle country of these
United States
live in god's country 'cause the hand of God is imprinted on the
earth
right where we live. His thumb made a dent that they calls Lake
Michigan
and his fingers formed the rest of the Great Lakes. This was
where he held
our planet in the palm of his hand and flattened the land whilst
he plucked
up the Rockies and Himalayas and scratched out the Mississippi
with his
fingernail. Sure seems to me that her people got it right, even
if them
little men with their chisels and stones didn't get it down.
Now that the earth is formed, God looks at it and sees that
it is
dull. Good but dull. I means so far all the stuff that's been
created ain't
got no color, no pizazz. It's all amade in those dull little
neutral colors
like brown and beige and foggy gray and watery blue. Not bad
colors
really, but if that's all the colors you gots the whole world
goin' look
like all those stuffy old ladies in the Daughters of the
Confederacy
meeting's.
So God decided to cover the earth with wonderful trees and
flowers and
grass in all the colors that he could think up. While he was at
it he made
smells, too. God is just so smart that he knew that grass
wouldn't be
grass if it didn't smell green; or that the brown earth needs to
smell rich
and loamy. I figure that smells and colors proves that God
exists. Who
else coulda thought such wonderful stuff up?
The next day God came up with the idea of animals. I figure
he
started with the fishies to fill the water. With a little bit of
clay
between his palms he just asorta squirted out each kinda fish
just like I
make the good pork sausages in the winter-time. He'd push 'em out
by
rounding his palms and squeezing 'til it almost popped out, then
flatten
the tail with the bottom of his wrists and use his fingers to
form the back
fin. When it was ready, painted and all, he'd take a deep
breath, cut
gills with his thumbnail and puff life into it as it splashed
into the sea.
Musta had a lotta fun making fishes. Fwipp,fwipp, fwipp.
When he was done with the fishes, he started on the animals.
Dogs
and cats and horses and bunnies and chickens and hogs and eagles
all the
splendor of the air and the land. Even the creepy crawly things
like
spiders and ladybugs and roaches (though I can't for the life of
me figure
what they're good for) were fashioned by God.
Now if you look at some of the animals, you know that God loves
to do
variations on a theme. Seems to me that he did birds after he did
fishes.
He'd squirt out their little bodies just the same way he did the
fishes.
=46wipp. Then he'd do the tails horizontal-like 'steada on the
up and down
and scratch out their feathers. Add the wings, scratch out the
big
feathers with his nails, pet them gently to make the little
feathers, pull
out their beaks and apaint them. Then he takes a breath, blows
life into
them, lifts his hands towards heaven and let them inhabit the
territory
between his home and ours. Some even sing the heavenly songs.
The four-footed animals, big or small, are all the same basic
thing. Roll
a sausage, pull down the legs, shape the head, make the fur
different every
time, and puff into life. Variations on a theme, but all
different,
that's the genius of it'all. Horses ain't cats, dogs ain't
mooses, and
mice ain't cows. Somehow, they's all different, even if they
kinda start
out the same. Snakes and spiders sure ain't the same, but God
made 'em all
and said that it was good. Then he told all them animals and
them birds
and them fishes to be fruitful and multiply.
See, I gets all this part about creation and can figure out kinda
how God
did it all. It all seems sorta logic-like if you know whats I
mean. It's
the next part the gets me all stuck. See the good book says
that God
created man in his own image, male and female created he them.
Seems to me
that this kinda means that God is both male and female, neither
one nor
t'other, you know? Now I don't mean God's weird, no nothin' like
that. I
kinda think that God's above it all, sorta more than either sex,
better'n
both. So God created both and blessed them and told them too to
be
fruitful and multiply. They even got dominion over all the
animals and
every green herb and all the rest of the things on the earth. I
always
figure that this is like the custodial care they gave me when my
mama was
dyin'. I had to take care of her and be sure that all the stuff
that she
had was used for the good of everybody. I kinda think that this
is what
God meant when he blessed his work on the sixth day. A whole
lotta work got
done in less than a week. Startin' with nothin' God made the
heavens and
the earth and all the things thats in 'em. Sun and stars, rivers
and seas,
flowers, trees and finally just likes they say, he saved the best
'til last
and makes humans. Not a bad tally.
We all know that God rested on the seventh day and I have no
quarrel with that. In fact I's kinda grateful-like. I likes
gettin' all
dressed up and walkin' down to the chapel and spending some time
asingin'
and atalkin' to the Lord. Don't quite know how they figures that
makin'
the Sunday dinner ain't no work on the day of rest, but still I
like my
Sabbath.
Now here's the part that's really got me stumped. See, the
good
book tells us all about the creation and about how God rested on
the
seventh day. But then, just after I gets it'all and am just
kinda
demystifyin' and understandin' the "in his own image male and
female he
created them" part, they go and tell it all over agin. From the
top. Only
they don't tell it the same!
I mean, ifen the good book is the exact word of God as Mr.
Preacher man
says it is, how can it change from one chapter to t'other? See,
in Chapter
Two, God does the land first and then the oceans and seas, not
t'other way
'round like in the first one. I really don't think that this
makes a whole
lotta difference in the entire scheme of things, but it just
don't seem
right ifen all the words are exact. And then it gets worse. A
whole lot
worse. Now it tells us that God made Adam on day three, before
the grass
and the trees and before the fishes and the animals. And he made
Adam,
just Adam nobody else. What happen' to the "male and female he
created
them" part?
This is where it came to me that the problem ain't with God's
word, it's
with those poor ol' little scribes that was atryin' to take down
what the
Lord said and just not gettin' it right. I figures that the
first guy was
editin' as God went along just sorta takin' down the highlights
as fast as
he could. I think that he gots it mostly right, personally,
'cause it's
kinda logic-like and rings kinda true. Even the male and female
part. The
second guy musta dropped his pages somehow, maybe even breaking a
couple,
and he just kinda put 'em back best he could, but being a typical
guy he
don't abother to number his pages likes we was taught to do so he
got the
pages all mixed up and he gots parts of the story wrong. He puts
land afore
water and Adam afore the fishes. You gots to feel a little bit
sorry for
this guy, I mean God trusted him to take dictation and he blows
it. So
what's he gonna do? He puts the little pieces together like a
jig-saw
puzzle but he ain't got the picture right so he just sorta fills
in the
blanks with all the whatnot that he remembers or may be even been
told. He
wasn't lyin' 'xactly, just tryin' to cover up his fumble-fingers.
So on day three he says that God created Adam takin' the stuff of
life not
from the good stuff that formed heaven and earth, but from dirt
and dust.
In a sad sorta way it makes some sense, you know? Ain't been a
guy God
ever made that didn't enjoy rolling 'round in the dust and the
dirt and the
mud like a hog in a swamp. How else you explain football and
swamp
trackin'? Mighta happened that way I guess. Anyhow, God breathed
life into
Adam and made him a livin' soul.
Next, according to this version, God made all the plants and
grasses and
the trees, created the garden of Eden and put Adam there to live.
Nows the
interestin' thing about the garden is that not only does it have
all the
beeutiful trees God ever made, but it also contains the tree of
life, which
ain't ever 'splained. I mean what's this tree do? If you eat
it's fruit,
do you live forever? Or, ain't there no sex in God's garden and
people
beget people by eating a pear or a nut or whatever the tree has
ahangin'
that would give life. And I wonders too ifen the animals got to
eat from
this here tree. Would only be fair if there were critters in the
garden.
Seems like a really important tree to me to just get mentioned
and not get
talked about.
There's another tree in the garden, too, according to this
version-the tree
of the knowledge of good and evil. Now, ifen I didn't understand
the
meaning of the tree of life, I really don't understand 'bout this
tree.
See, the story goes on to say that God tells Adam that ifen he
eats from
the fruit of this tree he shall surely die. I gots big problems
with this
part. I mean why would God deliberately put a tree in the middle
of a
perfect garden and then say that it should never be enjoyed?
Seems kinda
cruel to me. Is this some sort of test? Is the tree of life the
cure for
the tree of knowledge? Ifen you eats from the tree of life do
you get to
eat from the tree of knowledge cause now you cain't die? Or, is
the good
book tellin' us it's true that ignorance is bliss, likes they
say. Don't
seem so to me. In my 'xperience it's what you don't know that
just about
kills ya. This tree stuff just don't seem right to me. I think
the little
scribe that was atryin' to glue back together the pieces of God's
word got
his trees all mixed up.
See, it just don't make no sense to me that God would not want
man to eat
from the tree of knowledge. I mean why? Cain't possibly be that
God wanted
man to remain stoopid. Without knowledge how's we gonna get to
know the
Lord? Without knowledge we'd just be 'nother animal. Even
animals learn.
It just don't make much sense. Cain't believe that the true word
of God
tells us to stay stoopid or die. Ifen that's the deal, looks
like I might
just live a long, long time, 'cause I ain't none too bright and I
sure
cain't figure out this conrumdrum.
Anyway, after God made the garden of Eden and put Adam in it, God
made all
the animals. Accordin' to this version they was made to keep
Adam company.
Dogs or horses make sense, but all the animals and the fishes and
the
creepy-crawlies? Seems a bit strange to me. Maybe it was just to
give Adam
his choice of companions from the whole collection. Doesn't say
whether
Adam ever took a pet. But it does say that God gave Adam a job.
He was
'sponsible for findin' names for all the animals. Don't say in
what
language, but that probably don't matter much. Sounds like God
did what I
would do when my kids were little. They'd get bored and all
whiny and
fussy and I would find something for them to do to stop them from
abotherin' me. I guess the job idea didn't work for God neither.
So Adam was put to sleep and God took a rib and created Eve.
Adam musta
liked her. Fact is, Adam is supposed to have said that a man
should leave
his father and his mother and cling to his wife. Now how in the
world
could Adam know about mammas and pappys? He was made from dust
and dirt and
the breath of God. Was he a nibblin' from that thar tree of
knowledge?
Might just be since it says that they were both nekked. Or, had
the
chiseling little scribe added some details and an itty-bitty
lesson? Could
be. Don't make no sense elsewise.
Ifen I's all flummoxed by chapter two, I's stopped cold and silly
by
chapter three. I gots troubles with it right from the git-go.
See, it says
that the serpent starts atalkin' to Eve. Now how could Eve
understand the
serpent? Snakes just don't speak English or French or whatever
forrin
gobbledegook that they used thar in the garden. Serpents don't
atalk to
people and people don't atalk with snakes. Most people don't
even like 'em
much. So how come Eve's achattin' away with the serpent?
I gots two idees 'bout this. Maybe that ol' scribe that dropped
his stone
tablets got the pages mixed up and poor ol' Eve had eaten from
the tree of
knowledge sometime previous. This kinda makes sense 'cause it
'splains how
come Eve and the ol' snake could achat. 'Sides, seems to me that
ifen
anyone had atold me that all I had to do was chow on down a
couple o'apples
or walnuts-I always kinda figured that the tree of knowledge had
to be a
nut tree 'cause its hard to get at the fruit, but it's always
rewardin to
do so-ifen all it took was eatin', then that feller Einstein
would have
nothin' on me. I'd be chowin' down so fast I'd look like a
chipmunk with
nuts in both cheeks. Seems to me it's better be fat and smart
than fat and
stoopid, 'specially ifen you carryin' a bit o'poundage already.
It's my
best instinct that Eve just didn't plan to be stooped.
There's another possibility, however. Maybe that poor little
chiseler
didn't just mess up his pages, maybe he dropped 'em an' broke off
a piece
or two. Maybe God didn't tell ol' Adam and Eve not to eat from
the tree of
knowledge, maybe God tol' 'em not to eat from the tree of
UN-knowledge.
See, the way I figures it, thar ain't no way that God would do
his very
best work, make his very best creation and not make it absolutely
perfect.
So, ifen we smart when we starts out, then it would be a bad
thing, a
really terrible sin to eat from the tree of UN-knowledge. Each
bite would
take away brain cells, kinda like the white lighten' lickker ol'
Uncle Jeb
usta make in his still beyond the barn. That would 'splain how
Eve and the
serpent could get to achattin', but it wouldn't 'splain why Eve
was moved
to eat from the tree. Stoopid ain't somethin' to aspire to.
Stoopid just
is and there ain't no way Eve or anybody else goin' to go out of
their way
to acquire some stooped.
Then there's another thing, why would any thinkin' person believe
that Eve
would be atempted by a snake? If you goin' send an animal to
tempt me into
doin' something I ought not to do, don't use a snake. I'd just
run away as
fast as my legs could carry me. I'd be a runnin' so fast that
ol' snake
would have to yell across three counties afore I slowed down
enough to hear
him. Ain't no snake gonna tempt me. No way, no how. Now ifen
the
temptation come in the form of a little kitty-cat or a puppy dog
or even a
nice ol' horse come whisperin in my ear, then maybe I'd alisten.
But not
a snake.
Anyway, the book says that Eve ate of the fruit of the tree and
then shared
it with Adam, who was a lyin' there next to her just alistenin'
to the
serpent and Eve conversin' but he doesn't say a word, not even
when Eve
tells the snake that Adam tol' her that God tol' him that the
fruit was
forbidden. No siree bob, Adam doesn't pertect Eve from the
snake and he
doesn't say a word about the Lord's warning. Eve, who got the
word
second-hand from Adam has to make all the decisions. She decides
to taste
the fruit. Seems that it musta tasted pretty good, cause she
hands Adam
some and he tastes it, too. He don't protest. He don't hesitate
and he
don't quote the Lord, he just eats the fruit. I figures that the
lady Eve
gots a pretty fine heart, she finds somethin' good and she offers
to share.
No selfishness in her spirit, anyway. But she sure as shootin'
got in
trouble for it. So, according to the book, they's just a lying
thar under
the tree munchin' away and enjoyin' the feast when they hear's
the Lord
acomin' and acallin' to Adam. So Adam tells Eve we better hid
ourselves in
the bushes and shrubs 'cause the Lord's acomin' an' we's nekked.
I figure
that being nekked and all they didn't climb no trees.
The Lord spied 'em out o 'course, bein' the Lord an' all and axed
'em why
they's hidin'. Well ol' Adam he just piped right up and 'splains
that
they's in the bushes 'cause they's nekked and they didn't want to
show
their privates to the Lord. I cain't rightly figure that out,
neither. I
mean God amade 'em both with his own two hands he pulled 'em up,
and pushed
'em in, and smoothed 'em out, and patted 'em into shape before he
stood 'em
up and put 'em into the garden. What they mean they don't want
God to see
their privates? God made their privates!
So God axes 'em, how come y'all know you're nekked, you been
tasting the
forbidden fruit? Now, I's still having trouble wit' figurin' out
why
anything's forbidden in paradise, and I's havin' even more
trouble tryin'
to unnerstan' why wantin' more wisdom is made out to be a bad
thin' in the
good book. I mean it kinda puts Eve in a pretty good light to my
way of
thinkin'. Our Eve, she wasn't a tempted with big ol' fancy
jewels like
diamonds and rubies and such or, fancy clothes. They was anekked
remember
so they mighta liked some coverin', I's figger. But Eve said no.
She
wasn't even tempted by the pleasures of the flesh or by riches
beyond
measure. No, Eve, if we believe the book, was tempted by
knowledge and
that don't seem so bad to me, but that ain't no never mind to the
story.
Adam, nekked as a jay bird, tries to cover his behind with words
and tells
theLord that the woman God gave him made him eat the fruit. Now,
when one
o' my boys points a finger at t'other one and says somethin' like
'he made
me do it,' I just afigure that the both of 'em gots to be in on
it, an'
both of 'em gonna get the back of my hand. But ol' Adam he goes
a step
further. You see what that ol' boy is adoin'? He not only
blamin' the
women for handin' him the apple, he ablamin' God for agivin' him
the woman
in he first place. Seems to me like Adam ain't no gentleman.
Then God turns to Eve and axes her what happened. She admits
that she ate
the fruit and that the serpent beguiled her. Pretty stand up of
her under
the circumstances to my way of thinkin'. She admits both the
beguilin' and
the eatin' and she don't blame her companion none. Looks to me
like Eve's
the one with the honor in this picture.
After ahearin' all o' this, God starts metin' out the
punishments. To the
snake he says that its ain't never gonna have any legs and it's
gonna crawl
on its belly forever and be hated by the whole human race. I
cain't speak
for everybody in the whole wide world, but mosta us ain't too
fonda snakes.
Then God tells Eve that he agonna multiply her sorrows and her
conceptions.
Sorta seems like somethin' is a missin' here ifen this follows
llogic-like.
With every chile I done conceived, my fear and my sorrow done
increased
some, but my joy done increased so much that only the Lord
himself, and
every other mother, acourse, knows how I glory in my chillen. I
figure that
the fumble-fingered scribe done dropped and broken off the part
about joy,
and adidn't try to fix it 'cause men jus' don't, an' probably
cain't never
unnerstan' how unimportant the pain becomes once you hold your
child in
your arms. Never could figure how the good book could consider
motherhood
a curse. Seems kinda odd to me since only the Lord and women can
bring
forth life.
Now can you credits this-in the same verse sayin' that motherhood
is a
curse, it says the woman's desire shall be her husband and he
shall rule
over her. I puzzled over this a long, long time. No joy in
bringin' forth
life? Women cursed with over-desiring their man, to the point
that he rule
over her? I's just didn't see it. An then it acome to me. Which
sex is
cursed with over-desirin'? Who's ruled by them thar hormones?
Who's
willin' to do it anytime anywhar without no thought a'tall 'bout
the
consequences? It sure ain't the daughters of Eve, that's for
true. That
little old chiselin' scribe was tryin' so hard to fill in the
blanks on
those broken tablets that he gots his pronouns wrong!
Its Adam who has children in sorrow because he cain't never
rightly tell
ifen his kids is really his kids. And its Adam whose cursed with
over-desirin' and hang-dawgin' ifen a woman turns him down. Much
as I
hates to admit it, most every guy can be puts under the thumb of
any ol'
sweet young thing that willin' to do it regular. In my
experience, it
works that way whole lot more that it work t'other with the woman
abeggin'
for a little nookie. Seems like this makes a whole lot more
sense and
follows the way of the world like I knows it.
Then the book says that Adam had to live by the sweat of his
brow. Seems
to me the pronouns gots switched here, too. Everybody knows, a
woman's
work is never done, no matter how hard she tries. A man can sit
on the
back porch whittlin' on some wood, or just a rockin' away whilst
we's a
cookin' and amendin' and atendin' to the chillen. The little
chiseler just
gots his males and his females all mixed up.
When God was done with his curses, he gave the pair of them
animal skins to
cover themselves with and threw the pair of them out of the
garden and into
the world. Then he sets a flamin' sword to spin round and round
at the
entrance of Eden so that nobody gets to eat the fruit of the tree
of life
and live eternal.
See now, I thinks that that's strange, too. I mean, seems to me
that ifen
I was cursed to live a horrible life, I don't think I'd wanta
extend it.
Eternal life is only a good thing when life is good. If life is
bad, you
hope it ends quick. So, ifen God was so danged mad at Adam and
Eve why
didn't just let them have a bite o' the tree of life and prolong
their pain
forever?
I think it's because God ain't such an angry God. God gave us
sorrow, but
he made us joyful, too. He gave us rainbows and birds and music
and lots
of other things that lifts our hearts. I cannot believe that he
wants his
people to be sad, in pain and stoopid just cause some ancient old
guy from
long ago took down God's word as best he could, dropped the
stones he was
aworkin' on and got it a little mixed up. The poor ol' scribe
fudged a
little bit here, added a little bit there and reversed who did
what 'cause
he just didn't know any better. And in the end poor ol' Eve was
given the
baddest rap of all time. And all because a fumble-fingered guy
never
bothered to number the pages.
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